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Confinement lady or not?

After having little Keziah without a confinement lady, I really think I should get one for the 2nd one. Just think of the experience of the first, having to manage everything myself, the tiredness, the little help to coax the little one till it was crisis point really motivate me to want to pay $1800 for a confinement lady to help out. At least I hope I can get more rest and recuperate from the first and not be aching now in the early weeks with this 2nd one. Otherwise, I am not sure if I can go beyond number 2.Also, I want to spend some time with little Keziah even on the arrival of the 2nd to bridge their gap. Don't want to start off with grounds for siblings rivalry.

But some considerations:
1. Where is the CL going to stay? We don't have any spare room and she might have to share my room with me. Otherwise, it's the study room that link the hall and kitchen but that would mean she won't have any privacy. Actually this is our biggest headache!
2. Availability? Having called 2 CLs, both were already booked for Jan. Can you imagine, people already started booking CL at 5 weeks of conception! One of them was even the Mother-in-law who called to book her service.
3. Price. Worth paying for their service? These are mainly Malaysians and if we don't apply temporary work permit for them, fingercrossed we don't get caught and simply have to let them go to checkpoint to have passport stamped again. On top of that, we have to also include her meals while she cooks for Mommy.
4. Good care of baby especially coaxing a wakeful one if that happens again.
4. Good confinement food and REGULAR meals. Otherwise, my mum will have to rush to and fro to bring me food. Hopefully no more diluted red date longan water.
5. Pro-breastfeeding? Able to cook food to support breastfeeding and not like some elders who keep saying that bm not filling, bm not enough.

Any advice?

3 comments:

iemuhs said...

Hey Joan,

I didn't have a confinement nanny after my delivery and so I can't comment much, but I think if you really don't have help from your inlaws, it might be worth engaging one. Afterall, this is not your first child and you do need all the help you can find to take care of the baby and yourself.

I think if you look around more, should be able to find a good one. As for cost, since becoming a mommy, I always think that if money can solve your headache, then use it to solve it. $1800 is ok I think, for saving your sanity?! :) Of course, hopefully you won't get those nasty ones that totally don't heed your preference and likes to nag about breastfeeding. Maybe can ask their view on breastfeeding during your interview with them. They should be able to cook regular meals!!

As for space at home, I think actually that could be a bigger problem ... would you all be considering moving out and get your own place? Cos that might be an eventuality with 2 children...or will your hubby's sibling be moving out? If not moving out, guess having your hubby sharing his bro's room might be the best solution...it's only temporary.. if you can bear with that, maybe it's ok? Just my 2 cents worth. :)

Joanie said...

Thanks for your thoughts. Yupz, guess I must be more eager in finding a confinement lady though I also didn't have one for my first. Asked my Hb to speak to my MIL and he said my MIL will look for a good one so we shall see the outcome. Not sure when she will start the search.

Oh yes, we will be moving out. Already gotten a place in Toa Payoh but still in progress of building. Haha, and yes, it won't be ready by the time no. 2 is here. Guess really no choice have to cramp abit and have CL in my room.

Jayden's Mom said...

Just to share my views on confinement lady.

I had to have 1 cos' there's nobody to help, my MIL and mom was no longer around.

The one I had was pretty good. Very pro-breastfeeding, even came to my room to wake me up and insist that I feed my boy. It's only when i had very bad sored and bleeding nipples then she advised me to express my BM. She even insisted I go buy an electric breastpump!

She can cook pretty well and take her own initiative to do alot of stuff which included the household chores. She also insist that my boy wear cloth diapers during the day. Disposable diapers were used for only bedtime.

The only thing I didn't like about her was she wasn't very hygienic and can be a little careless. Afterall she's 60 already.

Too bad she decided to retire after my assignment or else I would have recommended her to you. She said she ever slept in the living room for a few of her assignments!