Without CL

After having been 'pampered' for 25 days, not having to domuch aside from feeding, expressing milk and eating, reality now sets in after CL left on Friday evening. Mommy has gotten to manage all things by herself once again from showering, diapering, coaxing baby to sleep as well as Keziah when she gets back from ah ma's place and Nei Nei has appointment. The first night wasn't easy. Little Abel was screaming as Mommy cleaned him up for the eveing. Yes, it's not the familiar voice and hands that's quick in action. Really things are different from seeing how the action is done and doing it yourself, i.e. getting your hands dirty. Mommy was frustrated with Keziah messing around while she was feeding Abel and there was no aid from an extra pair of hands.

Daddy too had the first encounter with Abel's night wakings when all moved back to sleep in the room. Thank God that Keziah wasn't awaken by her brother's cries for feeds every 2hly. Somehow, Abel just didn't want to sleep from 2-4am and it was a tough night for Daddy. Mommy had juz expressed some milk and Abel was crying again, so without much choice, Daddy had to warm the milk and begin again to recall how to bottle feed the little one. It was just so interesting that things not in practice really felt raw after some time. There wasn't even enough hot water to warm the milk.

Having been frustrated for a day and finding Daddy impatient as well, Mommy finally broke down after settling the kids on Saturday night. She simply found that Daddy couldn't understand the tiredness that she was facing. The last straw was when Daddy said he was so tired that he could fall asleep once he hit the pillow. Mommy was so sad that there seemed to be no one to share in her tiredness. Well, this was the sign of postnatal blues when everything seemed to fall on her and all she could think about was her 'plight' to the extent of entertaining thoughts of not wanting Abel. Thankfully Mommy broke down and poured all out to Daddy. Otherwise, who knows what this postnatal blues could develop to worse off postnatal depression. Really having children and parenting have to be a shared labour between the two.

Thank God things got better by Sunday where bath was more or less no longer a struggle and in fact, an enjoyable bonding time. Abel is also more or less on a routine though he is feeding ever so frequently such as 1-2hly that Mommy hardly had much rest. Actually speaking eversince Abel was born, Mommy hardly had more than 4-6hours of STAGGERED sleep daily since even at night, Abel was feeding 2hly, i.e. Mommy had most closed her eyes for 1 hr or abit more before the little one was crying for feed again. Yes, this is the intial grilling state of breastfeeding, either you overcome it or give way to formula feed. Mommy is still fighting the battle, trying all means to boost her milk supply from drinking fish and papaya soup to frequent expressing (as often as she could though it's just a pathetic 20-30ml after latching Abel), popping fenugreek pills. Though a 2nd time Mommy, each pregnancy and child rearing have its own challenge and doesn't mean experience makes it any easier (some help probably).