Having a child...Responsibilities

Now with 2 children and still working, life has become really tough. Wonder why? To many, lives go on as per norm even after having children as they have great family support from the extended family. Daddy and mommy could leave the children in the good hands of grandparents while they are at work. Mommy had a colleague who is a year old and now pregnant with the 3rd child. When asked how she could cope, all thanks to her mom who takes care of her 2 children. They are with grandma for the week, with Mommy popping in everyday to visit. Yes, the good thing, mommy gets more rest but the downside the children are brought up the way grandma does it rather than how mommy would like it to be. That being said, children don't remember much of their infant/toddler years till they are about 3 or more. However, seriously speaking when you are working full time, you really want some time off like such. Probably not every night, but once in awhile to get a breather.

Really having a child is a joy but it comes with great responsibility. Not to mention now that with two, it's even a greater bundle of joy and yet a greater load of responsibility to bear as parents. Sometimes, Mommy really wondered if she thought hard enough before having the little ones. It's really a dilemma. One has to have the time to take care and nurture the children. It would be great if Mommy could quit the job and nurture the little ones. This is a joy with one but could be a challenge with two not to mention three. It would definitely take time to work out a routine so that life can be more predictable with the little one. However, for now, this option is out till Mommy completes her bond unless someone is going to come out with some good bucks to buy her out. If not, make sure there is a willing soul, best a member of the extended family, to take care of the little ones, with priority given to the welfare of the little ones. Yes, that means sacrifice of their time and money which they could probably earn during this time. If their priority is the latter, probably consider twice. Living together doesn't equate to voluntary help.

Last but not least, if things really don't work out, it would be infant/childcare. This is definitely getting popular here in Singapore. Even the papers reported that there is an increasing demand for infantcare centres. Looks like life now in Singapore is getting tough with a single income. However, a word of caution, your kid will fall sick very easily, like what Mommy is going through now with Keziah. It's to the doctor every other week. When she's down, the little brother gets it as well. That's a real pain, both of the heart and of the pocket. Mommy was counting and we would have spent nearly $800 or more on medical bills on the two kids over the past month. Keziah would probably have been in school for 3 out of 5 days a week. Sometimes, she really questions herself whether money is well spent as it seems for now she's paying money to have Keziah fall sick, and paying more just to see a doctor. Yes, Keziah is definitely learning from school. At least now, she communicates in more or less complete statements, expresses herself better and surprisingly, less reserve before strangers or should we say overly friendly that we worry that she would just follow anyone that comes her way and even overcome her fear of seeing her PD whom she previously would cry the roof down the moment she stepped into his room without him even examining her.

So consider carefully before you have a child. What is it that you want in life?

Mommy now just wants to get over and done with for next week for work is madness now with an conference next week. This weekend Mommy will have to work as well. Little Abel has to start on formula for Mommy can't be sure she could find time and space to express milk and probably would have to bear the painful engorgement which will kill the supply. Keziah was just about to recover and yet hit again by another bulk of bugs. She is now seriously coughing with deep phelgm and sore throat that are irritating her sleep. Not surprisingly, she had been very happy on days she didn't have to go to school and even said "I'm still sick. No school." while she happily throttled off to play in the house. To avoid the spread of bugs, Abel is temporarily staying over at Ah Ma's place for the night and probably for next week too, if need be, in view of Mommy's schedule if Ah Ma could cope with the little one. Mommy will still need to drop off milk at Ah Ma's place in the night after putting Keziah to sleep. At least, Mommy could manage Keziah better rather than having hands tied with two struggling ones when she rushes home from work as there is an assumption that Mommy is independent enough. Mommy always look forward to Daddy's return everyday when she gets some decent help. These days Mommy is really like a mad woman in the house, constantly forgetting things, such as even bringing milk and medication for Abel in the morning. Thanks to Ah Gong who could drop by to pick up the staff for Abel. However, guess everyone thinks that Mommy's coping great coz she looks great at work as her colleagues commented "radiant and back in shape". Nobody believes that she was back in shape in just that one month all thanks to nursing sick children and herself and sleepless nights. All the clothes she bought in May coz she she wasn't losing weight are now far too lose to even wear as hipsters.